Category: Plane

To the surprise of no one

The French flight attendants were on strike, so the ladies in charge of Dad’s flight to Paris, then Copenhagen were “professional but a bit abrupt,” according to sources.*

The plan was for Dad and me to meet at the train station at the Copenhagen airport. His flight wasn’t scheduled to land until 730pm, so I thought I had acres of time at 8 to secretly eat a pastry as I waited. Just as I was about to take my first bite, I hear my name correctly pronounced for the first time in almost two months. Mouth wide open, eyes wide open, I see Dad across the tracks on the other platform.

It is so nice to speak American with someone.

Dad seems quite at home here, though I had to show him how to operate the shower. “These buttons don’t do anything!”

Welcome to Europe.

I am reading The Family Romanov by Candace Fleming and Good Behavior by Molly Keane.

*Dad

 

En route

So far so good except for both my bag and my body failing the security test and requiring further investigating, almost falling asleep on the plane only to be awakened by a baby who suddenly realized it’s still a baby, and walking a few miles around the Dublin airport before sitting under the flickering light of the boarding display in despair.  One bright light was a security lady who said “Just go wait at the pub then!” and shooed me away. This lady is an angel.

I did find my gate, though. Not to worry. I wasn’t reading the subtext:
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A few other delights happened, like my hair getting caught in a nightmare of accordion action on the boarding tunnel (how? what? how? three excellent questions), which I think gave me whiplash; a teenage boy standing over me in the aisle casually looking down my dress until I asked him about his SAT score; and Ian, who sold me a smoothy at the Dublin airport and then asked if I wanted a smoke break.

Other than eating beef stew airplane food and a lack of sleep the likes of which I have not dealt with since grad school, all is well.

Bu there are sill miles to go before I sleep.

Packing and other impossibilities

I leave tomorrow. I’m leaving. The. Country.

As I was separating everything I want to pack into piles, Lil Bro came in my room to observe. He then spent an uncomfortable amount of time trying to teach me to flick my pocket knife open in a sweeping jabbing motion. To do this is simple: I just need to stop being left-handed and caring at all about my nails. Honestly I am bringing a knife to open challenging food packaging and to pry my case off my cell phone to remove my sim card. Lil Bro advised me to perhaps consider buying pepper spray, and then he ambled out to check on his frozen chicken Alfredo.

Food was also on my mind and was my first item to pack. I am worried every meal in Europe will be covered in vinegar, so about a fourth of my suitcase is filled with foodstuff.

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Did you spot the ketchup packet? I might bring more of those. You just never know.

Then it was time to color code my psychoses.

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Blue for every day, light blue for trouble, white for emergencies, and so on.

Next I checked Pinterest and learned the right way to roll/origami my way through the heap of black clothes I’m bringing. The eight black shirts I packed are rolled into torpedoes lining the bottom of my suitcase. Rolling got a bit tedious and unrealistic–I’m not going to pack this painstakingly every time I need to catch a train. So then I just forced everything else on top of the row of rolled shirts.

 

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That bra is a 36DD for scale.

Today around 6PM, I tried to check-in to my flight, which leaves tomorrow at 5:30PM.  After entering my flight information, the Aer Lingus website rejected my check-in with this gem:

As this flight is departing in more than 30 hours, if you choose to check in now for this  flight there is a charge for seat allocation (unless previously purchased seats). Alternatively you can check in online for this flight within 30 hours of flight departure time and avail of free seat allocation.

First of all, can we please take a moment to deal with the phrasing “avail of free seat allocation”?

Now, I have recently become mediocre at math, so I know this message is nonsense. I checked back again a few minutes ago–10PM–but the same malarkey manifested. I am displeased and unimpressed. The FAQs said that a transatlantic flight is eligible for check in 24 hours prior to takeoff, but the website still failed this test.  I would like to avail of free bullshit. I’ve been spending so much time worrying about how to navigate the ridiculosities of the Eurail system that I completely forgot to fret over the plane ride.

I must remember that “in nonsense is strength.” (Breakfast of Champions, Kurt Vonnegut)

It might serve you well to remember that, too, when reading these posts.

As for reading, I read a few poems in Imitations by Robert Lowell before returning it unfinished to the library.

Now I am going to lie down and start the long process of saying good bye to my bed.